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Let's rebuild a fucking house

This is a bit of a shorter post, and a follow up to my post from a few days ago.

I've decided that the following things will be necessary in order for me to ever recover:

- Get professional help

- Get better at expressing things that bother me

- Get better at talking to other people about it


Get professional help I've scheduled an appointment with my physician for this Friday, in order to get a referral for a psychiatrist (and something else but I won't share that unless it turns out to be relevant).

I'm still terrified, but these things won't get better by themselves, and I really don't want to feel like this anymore


Get better at expressing things that bother me That's the reason I've started this site/blog, not only to get these things out of my head, but also to force myself to formulate them into actually senteces, into structured stories. To really force myself to clarify what I'm really thinking and really feeling, because most times, it just exists in my mind in its most basic and chaotic form.


Get better at talking to other people about it This will likely take the most work and time, as it completely goes against how I'm wired and how I've always done things. Luckily, I have a very kind and sweet person in my life who is familiar with my issues and has the same neurodivergencies as I do, and they've already been very helpful to me. Now all I need to do is keep practicing this.


So yeah, things are happening. I'm very scared, but I think this is the right way. Now I just hope I can keep this all up, and maybe one day I'll be able to say I'm doing fine again.

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